The Queen's Lovers
by Nerdherder51
Summary: Queen Clarion and Lord Milori are madly in love, but does she have a dark secret he should know about? Parody / Satire. Silly fun. Rated T for some mild, mature humor. One shot. Complete


**The Queen's Lovers**

**Queen Clarion, Lord Milori, The Disney Fairies and all related content are the property of The Walt Disney Company. This fan fiction is not for monetary gain, but is intended solely for the entertainment of its audience.**

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Milori knocked at her door. "Clarion, it's me."

Silence.

Another knock. "Hello?"

_Strange_, Milori thought, _she always answers the door to her bed chamber when I come calling._

Finally it opened, the queen stood in the doorway in all her finery and regal glory.

"My word! You look absolutely breathtaking, Ree," he said to her.

"Come in, dearest husband," she beckoned. "You appear exhausted and in need of my invigorating embrace."

"Oh, yes," he said striding into the room. Milori closed the door behind him. She put her hands to his face and looked into his eyes. He was stressed and weary. She kissed him.

"I have had the worst day," he said. "Only the promise of this night gave me the strength to endure."

"You say such wonderful things to me, my love." Clarion embraced him emphatically. While in his arms she peered over. The door to her walk in closet drew open. She waved to its occupant who silently closed it again.

"Come, let me refresh you with a drink of our finest wine," she said. Clarion took Milori's arm and pulled him to a small table upon which was a decanter and two glasses. She poured the intoxicating beverage into both glasses, handed him one and sipped from hers. She kept his back to the closet door.

"Excellent vintage, dearest," he said after taking a drink.

"Only the best for my favorite lover," she replied.

He took another sip. Then stopped. "Favorite? You have others?"

"There is only you," she said trying to allay his fears.

"You said 'favorite', that implies more than one" Milori pressed. "Be straight with me. I know it isn't uncommon for the queen to take lovers on the side."

"You read too much into it," she parried.

"Out with it, Ree," he demanded.

"Very well," Clarion said. She drew in an anxious breath and then spoke. "Hyacinth."

"The Minister of Spring?! That jittery fop?!"

She give him a sly grin. He eyed her suspiciously.

"You're playing with me aren't you?" he said.

"Yes," she replied with a giggle. "I'm sorry, Milori. You just read too much into what I was saying. I couldn't resist seeing you get so jealous."

She took his hand in hers, pulled him close and whispered. "Now let me take away all of your worries and make you the happiest sparrow man in all of Pixie Hollow this good night."

Clarion pulled her lover close and kissed him passionately. Milori wrapped her in his strong arms and readied himself for a night of grand pleasures.

While they kissed, Clarion waved her hand. The door to the closet opened slowly. Out slipped Hyacinth. He was unsure, but she insisted. He slowly, quietly floated across the floor to the doorway. The Minister of Spring, with just the lightest touch turned the knob and opened the door.

Then he looked back to the closet and motioned with his arm. From the darkened room came Redleaf, the Minister of Autumn. He was quickly followed by Sunflower and then Snowflake. Behind them Silvermist, Fawn and Tinker Bell. A procession began to form as one after another people emerged from her enormous closet. All of them silent as they moved to the exit without being seen or heard. Clarion keeping her husband's back to the door and his full attention on her.

Then Tinker Bell sneezed. "ACHOOO!"

Milori spun around.

Tinker Bell smiled sheepishly and said, "Sorry."

Milori saw the line of people from her closet to her bed chamber's door. He looked back at his wife, eyes wide with horror.

"What is going on here?" he asked, not that he need an answer as it was all too clear to him. The woman he loved, to whom he had pledged his fidelity on their wedding day, had betrayed him. Over and over _and over_ again.

"My stars, woman, you've been busy," he told her, sounding most distressed.

"Milori, it's not what it looks like," Clarion said.

"Not what it looks like?" he repeated, outraged. "You're my wife, you are supposed forsake all others, it was in our vows. And this is what you do behind my back. And not just with another man, but with several other men. And women!"

He became flustered.

"Who else do you have in there?" Milori went to the closet door and opened it. What he saw absolutely shocked him. "Fairy Mary? Vidia? Clank? CHEESE!"

The Lord of Winter stormed back to Clarion.

"YOU'VE TAKEN A MOUSE AS A LOVER? Is that legal?! Is it even sanitary?!" his voice cracking as it momentarily reached a whole octave higher.

"Now dear, please, if you will let me explain," she said trying to calm him down.

"Explain?! Explain a mouse?! Your best friend?! All the ministers?! Tinker Bell?! That you were having an orgy?! How could you possibly explain that away to my satisfaction?!"

"Milori, please. It's really quite simple," Clarion said.

"Simple is one person! But this..., this is incomprehensible! It's intolerable!"

"Think about what day it is?"

"This is the single worst betrayal of marital fidelity I have ever witnessed," Milori bellowed.

"Please, dear, it will explain everything."

"What could you possibly get from a mouse that you can't get from me?!"

"Dear, the date."

"I don't want to think about today!" he roared, fury and indignation in his voice. "I want an answer!"

"What day is it?"

"It's Tuesday, the First of April! Why is that all of sudden so important?! You've turned our marriage into a farce and all you..." He stopped shouting as it dawned on him.

"Oh, dear. I think I've been had," Milori said in a quiet and restrained tone.

"Yes, Sweetheart, you have," Clarion said. She gave him a reassuring peck on the cheek. "April Fool."

The others in the room suddenly burst out into peals of laughter and revelry. The Lord of Winter, though feeling like a damned fool, joined them. They all patted Milori on the back or shook his hand for being such a good sport about it all. The small group milled about in the queen's bed chamber talking about it for sometime, retelling the events, sharing their thoughts, laughing heartily. Eventually they all left. Hyacinth was the last to go.

"I'll lock the door," he said on his way out.

"Yes, please do," Milori replied.

"You are something else, Ree," he said to his wife. She wore a silly grin and had trouble trying not to laugh. "You really were going to just stand there and let me act like a complete fool, weren't you?"

"It is April Fool's Day, Milori," was her calculated reply. She handed him his glass of wine and said, "Now then, why don't we pick up where we left off."

"Another April Fool's joke?"

"It's after midnight now," she answered, the clock on the wall reading 12:01. "This will be for real."

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**I hope you had fun. Thank you for reading.**


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